They will be filled with joy...

Those who have been ransomed by the Lord will return.
They will enter Jerusalem singing,
crowned with everlasting joy.
Sorrow and mourning will disappear,
and they will be filled with joy and gladness.
Isaiah 35:10

It's been an incredibly hard and sorrow-filled year. Sometimes I feel like I'm able to breathe and then the grief just overwhelms me all over again. I cannot write of all the times I still find myself turning to pick up the phone to call or bringing up an email to send to my mom. Everyone deals with losing a loved one in their own way and for me it is a constant.

I am tired. I am weary. I have choices to make. I can choose to dwell on what was with Mama & Daddy, but Mama is with the Lord now. When I talk with Daddy we still both grieve together and our conversations most times end in tears.

So, I choose for 2010 to find joy. Today I bought this little plant at the grocery store because I'm not sure there's much more joyful than these tiny little daffodils. I know they're probably called something else, but I also know that daffodils were favorites of both my mom's of of David's mom. My mom and Lodie were joyful people - not filled with selfish natures, but always looking toward the simple yet extravagant beauty of the flowers of Spring.

This $3 purchase is the beginning of something solid to represent the joy I'll be looking for in 2010.